Using words as “the bully”, “the victim”, etc. implies this is who they are, instead of looking at the action or situation. Kids go in and out of roles, and the child might be bullied in school, while at the same time being the one bullying someone else on the sports team. It is important to analyze the underlying cause for each incident and we need to support and allow our kids to make a different choice the next time they are in a similar situation.